Learning's of connecting back to old friends!!

Internet with its social networking sites provides ample opportunity to connect back to people whom otherwise we would have never imagined to get in touch. In a world without internet (example that of my parents)there might have been situations where school or college friends may physically meet in a shop or movie hall but not recognize each other as age metamorphism will be difficult to imagine.
However it is important to recognize that less than 1/100th of people moved so much across the globe or even within countries and the need to network through virtual world did not exist. For sure the boon of Internet is the ability to get back in touch with friends who otherwise would be just in faint memories.
Coming back to the learning's of connecting back...I do think the most important of all learning is to take it slow. The usual informality which existed in School or college days is not to be taken for granted at middle age or beyond. Sure it comes back but the time to accept this transition is different for different people. There are some people who take this to an extreme when they address people who are a little more successful or lucky as "Sir or Madam"...this is lack of self confidence. You should not go to the limit of calling the pet names or some specific habit the person had while young making the other person uncomfortable but building a distance by calling him/her Sir or Madam is also not a good starting point.
There are several ways one gets connected back-maybe through the social networking sites when someone guesses it should be you and calls to connect. This usually is quite sober interactive mode as it is one to one to begin with. There is a cascading effect to this that with enough quorum there is a need to build an Alumni Group.
This starts with a lot of zeal with friends getting friends and slowly building the network. There are some uncomfortable moments when the group tries to reinvent its current position with likes, what will tick, when things can be viewed seriously (in college days these were not even noticed), when to appreciate, when to wish etc.
This journey needs to be managed well. Usually the initial enthusiasm soon dies down with people taking to normal day to day affairs and not bothering to move further on the networking while some of them are very eager to pump emails/seek responses.
There is an important learning here-motivation of people who were together in their teens and led a carefree life competing with spirit (maybe partying with spirits too) evolve to be responsible parents with a cautious approach to everything in life including networking friends.This motivation difference is difficult to gauge and manage as most are spread out across the world and want to disclose as little as possible of what happened in the 20 years they were not in touch. A lot of them are apologetic but a lot more are wanting to stay aloof assuming friendship can be burden. (to be continued)

Periodic Table of basic human traits

As I am a great fan of convergence of knowledge, I had this weird idea this morning. Like we have periodic table for Chemical elements is it worthwhile to have Periodic table of basic human traits. This is just a conceptual thinking and is very much aligned to my confusions (some of my friends say they try to understand just 25% of what I try to say to avoid neuronal instability).
For example out of the 114 periodic table elements 92 naturally occur and only 22 don't occur naturally. Maybe in the periodic table of traits it will be 92 born traits and 22 will be those that can be learned traits or is it the other way. This can probably answer the questions which has long been pestering a lot "Are leaders born or made"...probably a bit of both. Situations make them but there is something in the DNA of a few that clicks faster than others.
Coming back to basics of periodic table-some of the basic metals become stronger if blended with some others for example Steel/stainless steel etc..nickel, cadmium, molybdenum make Iron stronger (bearing steel for example is a very high grade steel able to take dynamic loads without getting stressed). This also means that the basic DNA is just a starter..we need to blend a little more into this to get it perfect for situation. Some situation requires leaderships of strength (steel), some require high malleability, some high ductility, etc. The broad classification of metals and non metals may also be valid in traits. Most metals are solids except for example Mercury. Most leaders will have certain characteristic except certain exceptions but will still be leaders.
Whatever be it Chemistry with the people and create a following is an important leadership trait..this chemistry is very different from Periodic table. But Periodically there are some great leaders who remind us the power of perseverance and showing possibilities are limitless. Periodic table may just be a frame to structure a trait classification for a start.

Cold and Dark-Energy lost?

Living in Sweden there is one topic that cannot be escaped...weather. Whatever you start with finally an informal discussion always ends with weather discussions. There is a natural smile on everyone's face when it is a bright, sunny day with temperatures beyond 12 degrees. If it is raining or dark or cold or all of this together you can see serious people all around you. This is a big contrast for me-I am used to seeing people in India irrespective of wealth status or pains they have to push one day at time wearing a smile or are happy all the time. Maybe it is because they have sun all the time or there is something else that makes them happy.
This made me dwell deeper into the subject-"Cold and Dark-does this equal to Energy lost". External conditions which we don't control directly impacts our energy which we own and control. The answer to this lies not in the equation but in the way we are brought up. When I moved to Philippines, I heard a discussion of an interview in which there were 4 candidates for a position and was considered to be very tough competition. I remembered when I joined my first job there were 45 engineers interviewed for 2 positions and everyone thought they had a fair chance. Everyone was cheerful. When the results were announced apart from a momentary disappointment everyone moved on. Is this a philosophy of life Indians due to religion, culture or sheer competition imbibe? I am not sure. But the external factors (in this case competition) was not able to blunt the internal energy enough to take away the smiles and inherent happy state. On a similar note when I was talking to an old lady who has lived here for last 50 years (Who fought her cancer away)-she had a simple advice to live. Rain or cold-dress up your physical body for protection and do what your soul enjoys to do with no inhibition. Then you control your happiness. Don't sit at home and stare through the windows cursing the rains or darkness as this does not change anything but makes you feel more miserable. Just tuning the mind and telling to self that nothing can stop me from being happy is the therapy which we require to spread to the world. There is energy lost if we think hard about it and do nothing about it. If we have to do something then let us first tell ourselves that we are the Sun when light is not there (which is the principle of Advaita-every soul is the reflection of the bigger soul (God) similar to reflection of light from the Sun making smaller suns), we are the heat when heat is not there (we are afterall warm blooded and it only requires happiness to tune the body settings right apart from clothes)..Energy is in the soul and soul is connected to the body with the brains. Let us train ourselves to get the energy booster which is fully in our control and keeps the world moving forward despite pessimists and fatalists saying for example as per Mayan calendar the world will come to an end in 2012 Dec 21st.
As long as we live we will enliven others by not feeling depressed by anything outside us with the simple remedy within us-happiness reflected by smiling faces.