Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Introvert or Extrovert!!

Personality can be categorized into different ways and everyone is keen to know it from different angles as it is about themselves (who cares more about anything than self). One simple classification which one starts talking even in casual parties is Introvert/Extrovert. It is quite simple as the name indicates-a view if one is too much focussed on himself/herself or is a gregarious kind. I recently had a question from a friend who had less than 10 people networked in his LinkedIn compared to my more than 500-He said you are a real you make friends so easily. Again numbers don't indicate how much friends you have but with how many people you can truly share your feelings indicates this.
There is a lot of times as a matter of over simplicification Extroverts are made equal to be being more friendly than Introverts(like my friend above). It is the greatest myths that I want to discuss(I have more experience now as most Swedes will probably fit in the defintion as Introverts as per Global standards and I have been with them for more than 2 years now).
Let us go step by step into building of this myth:
1) Extroverts are able to start a conversation and smile their way into the hearts. They are very comfortable with strangers (more comfortable than with friends) and break the ice with ease. All this make them approachable and able to discuss on any topic as they strive to find a match...all are good signs of good friends. Right----Wrong I say. And why?
Extroverts are no doubt good at all the things mentioned above. But they are more floaters in most cases. They don't want to touch controversial issues or force decisions. In most cases they compromise to avoid uncomfortable situations. In other words they look at ploughing the field as wide as possible not as deep as possible. For an outsider it will look very impressive as the soil has been tilled at all places around the field. But is it good for the seeds to grow with roots set in firmly? Obviously not(for sure grass/weeds can grow better). Even if the field is tilled for a small area but deeper this when seeds get roots and grows healthy. Introverts are the ones who focus on fewer and smaller set of people but become genuinely attached to them. They cannot hide their emotions in their faces which is a strength rather than weakness. Therefore makings of a true friend is always in an introvert than an extrovert.
2) Introverts are uncomfortable in parties, get togethers and try to look for a corner to hide. Extroverts are loud and make the party memorable to all as they entertain themselves by entertaining others. This is indeed true. But party is not life. We can have party like pickle for food but can it be the food itself.
Therefore to feel extroverts are better than introverts itself is a feeling of depression which probably has been triggered by extroverts to make them feel one up against others. Introverts should feel proud about what they stand for and should live with what is most comfortable to them without getting distracted.
This does not mean that Introverts cannot be extroverts sometimes in life and vice versa. Actually I have always been comfortable being an Introvert the personality I was when I was till I joined college. Ragging does strange things to Teen age pride and it did bring in a change in me. I changed but try to retain the core of being introvert.
Therefore if anyone has debates on this topic let us be clear in our thinking. Live the life as we like it. Change only if you truly like the change. Else be what you are comfortable with as the world has enough possibilities to accomodate diversity.

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Gothenburg, Sweden
Still finding introspecting to find who am I? Waiting for a Guru!